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Written by GrantC   
Friday, 01 March 2013 20:35

 

 

 

 

Last Updated on Friday, 01 March 2013 20:45
 
carguyjon's ride PDF Print E-mail
Written by GrantC   
Friday, 01 March 2013 20:24
carguyjon

Name: Jon

Age: 27.5

Job Title: Acting Director

Hometown: Edmonton

Car: 2004 WRX Wagon

Color: Black on Black on Black on Dirty

Mileage: 169,000


What made you want to buy a Subaru?

Colin McRae did. I've always wanted one, but for a long time didn't know much about them. I did know that I thought Tommi Makinen was a bit too smug and flashy with his shiny red evo and shiny red race shoes, so McRae and his Subarus were my rally heroes.

I've traditionally had beaters for winter cars and fun cars in the summer. I was tired of fixing the beaters and spending more money and effort on keeping them running than on my race cars. I decided to spend some money on a Subaru as a reliable, fun, rally inspired, reliable, awd daily driver that would be fun in the winter and reliable.

As it turns out the real reason I bought the car was because of irony.

What makes your car different from others?

Nothing really other than the wheels are black and it has a hastily swapped EJ207 in it. Unless what you are really asking is what makes it different than all cars ever and to answer that question I'd have to build a Venn diagram the size of the moon. It's a non-hybrid if that helps narrow it down.

Also I have a skid plate made out of a street sign that I found in the bushes near my house.

What plans do you have for your car?

Current plans include:

 

  1. Repair the the Sti CBE that I purchased with a muffler that doesn't sound like a washing machine full of a bee farm.
  2. Repair the under-car flame-throwing mod caused by the exhaust header not quite sealing properly to the block.
  3. Repair the leaking gasoline under the intake manifold recall that didn't apply to JDM engines, of which the EJ207 is one.
  4. Repair the borked bolt that held my badass skid plate such that it can be reattached to the car.
  5. Get an STi splitter for the hood scoop.
  6. Replace my front O2 sensor so it is nice and warm and stops throwing a check engine light and I can stop explaining why my car appears to be ready to fall apart to all passengers ever

 

Future plans include

 

  1. Get a better headunit that has modern technology such as "line in".
  2. Nokian Hakkas to replace my current newspaper based winter tyres.
  3. Swap some bigger brakes for much more woah.
  4. Complete the rest of the STi drivetrain swap for much more weee!
  5. Add a supercharger because twin charging is like the quantum mechanics of forced induction.

 

Are you involved in Motorsports? Which ones?

Yes. I autox regularly with the ASA and try to hit as many Time Attack, lapping and HPDE events that my tiny moth-filled wallet will afford me. Probably not in this car though. It's too soft and plush to handle the corners very well. Like driving a waterbed made of boobies.

What is your favorite Subaru moment?

I've had a lot of good times pretending my car has the same offroad capabilities as a lifted Jeep. I discovered a place near an ecostation that appeared to be used by these so-called jeeps. I figured that my car could easily make it up the 40* iced incline. After all, I had a skid plate made out of a street sign, what is the worst that could happen. As it turns out the worst thing that could happen is making it nearly to the top and then sliding backwards while spinning sideways into some ruts and nearly flipping your car down a 15 foot embankment into a gully full of foot stool sized boulders.

I wasn't really worried though. After all: skidplate

If you could drive your car on any road in the world, where would you go?

In my Subaru I think the Monte Carlo rally stages would be fun. I'm fairly confident that I could at least be as fast as a Skoda. In my other car, it would have to be the nurburgring, obviously.

If Subaru didn't exist what would you be driving?

If Subaru didn't exist I would probably have a used Audi or a new Audi and debilitating consumer debt that would take me 3 lifetimes to claw my way out of. Or maybe an e30xi, but they drive so much like a tractor that I might as well buy a real tractor.

Actually ya, that's what I'd have: a tank.

What was your very first car?

My first car, that I actually owned, was an electric blue 1977 El Camino with a swapped 350 from a 1972 Monte Carlo SS. It was hilariously loud and pretty fast for being in high school. I once managed to cram 5 people in the front seat of that car. I used to dream of building into a rolling hottub but it was only 1/4 tonne rated and would have instantly converted the body into rust.

On the WSC website, what is your favorite forum to post in?

I like to post in the Ongoing Member Projects Forum - it makes me want to do more car stuff and inspires me to bust out The Convinciner for another delicate and precise #garageofidiots session. I also like to post in whatever forum Snackers posts in because his exhaust sounds so good and *swoon*.

What is your drink of choice?

Bellinis. When I order them though, I admonish the servers to call them Manllinis or Mascullinis because I'm manly as ffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffff

What is your favorite flavour of chicken wings?

Nachos. When I eat chicken wings I make a mess like a dog eating out of a trough of spaghetti. It looks like a warzone on my face and hands and table and wall and pants and shoes and socks and light fixtures. Besides, nachos taste better.

If you could fight any celebrity, who would it be?

Deborah Ann Woll. I'm like a 5 time KY wrestling champ. Don't ask to see the Championship Belt. It's at the cleaners.

Last Updated on Friday, 01 March 2013 20:46
 
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