One thing I find with online, especially with shooter games, is it'll take some time before you're decent. Mainly because other people playing have played much longer, know the maps, controls, techniques, etc. When I get a new shooter game and start playing, it's pretty ugly to start, but then I'm average after a few matches.
When BF3 first came out, I was single, and my best friends from back home had it so we played online a lot (instead of talking on the phone lol). I think I had about 170 hrs by the time I was done with it lol. This was over a couple of years of course. Sure don't have that kind of time now though.
I'd think Battlefield 1, or the new COD would be the way to go if you're looking for a game that many people you know play. I get BF1 for Christmas, although I get it in Arizona so I have to wait till after my trip to actually play it lol.